Tag Archives | baptize

Baptism Sound Effects

By jeff on September 7, 2016 in Comics

Baptism is a gift from God and is a part of your personal relationship with Jesus Christ. If you’re not baptized, talk to your pastor today.

↓ Transcript

Amos: Nim, how did you enjoy the baptism in church today?

Nim: Oh, it was all right, but if you ask me, it needed bigger production value. Lots of flash! Maybe do something cool with the lighting.

Amos: Ummm...
Nim: I've got it! Sound effects!!!

Amos: I don't think...
Nim: I BAPTISE YOU! ZING!!! POW!!!

Baptism

By jeff on June 6, 2016 in Comics

When you church has important moments – like Baptisms – make sure you’re involved in the importance of the event. Don’t just phone it in!

↓ Transcript

Amos: My church had six baptisms this past Sunday.

Con: That's awesome! You know, every time my church goes through one of our rituals, I can actually feel my relationship with God grow. It strengthens my faith and helps me to become an active part of the "Body of Christ."

Con: How did the baptisms make you feel, Amos?

Amos: Hungry! We were 30 minutes late getting out of church!

Mark 1:9-12 – Jesus and John The Baptist

By jeff on April 6, 2016 in Comics

One day Jesus came from Nazareth in Galilee, and John baptized him in the Jordan River. As Jesus came up out of the water, he saw the heavens splitting apart and the Holy Spirit descending on him like a dove. And a voice from heaven said, “You are my dearly loved Son, and you bring me great joy.” – Mark 1:9-12

↓ Transcript

Abby: My church baptizes people in the local river.

Con: That's neat. It's just like John and Jesus.

Abby: Yeah, but a little different.
Con: How?

Abby: I don't think Jesus was baptized to the sounds of "Marco...Polo!"

Matthew 28: High-Dive Baptisms

By jeff on February 22, 2016 in Comics

Jesus said about baptisms in Matthew 28, “Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.”

↓ Transcript

Nim: I have a great idea! High-dive baptisms!
Con: What?!

Nim: The preacher pushes people in the water from the highest-dive at a swimming pool! They get to accept Jesus and conquer their fear simultaneously!
("You're saved!" "Aaaa!")

Con: What about churches that baptize babies?
Nim: Two words: water wings!

Con: This is a really bad idea.
Nim: Pish-posh! Hurry up and get me a patent attorney on the phone!

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Tag Archives | baptize